A Parent’s Role in Dealing with Persistent Shadchanim
Dear Penina, I need help. I am the mother of a few children who are dating, and I love being involved in this process. I think about who might be right for them, I ask around, I daven for them, and I take it seriously. In these specific situations, the shadchanim are adding stress for […]
My Husband Is Married to a Screen
Dear Penina, I feel like my husband is married to a screen. My husband is a good man, a hard worker and a dedicated father, but the moment he walks through the door, his phone becomes an extension of his hand. Whether it is answering work emails, checking the news or scrolling through community group […]
Walking on Eggshells
Dear Penina, I love my wife deeply, but I feel like I am constantly walking on eggshells in my own home. Whenever I make a mistake—whether it’s forgetting an item at the store, missing a household chore, coming home late, or just saying the wrong thing in the wrong tone—the reaction is incredibly intense and […]
Dealing With Frustrating Mechutanim
Dear Penina, I am struggling with a situation that has weighed on me for years, ever since my daughter got married. I kept hoping time would soften my feelings toward our mechutanim, but instead, the situation has become more complicated as the family has grown. From the beginning, the relationship between our two families felt […]
The Language of Longing: Bridging the Appreciation Gap
Dear Penina, I love my wife and I think I’m a good husband. I work hard, I’m loyal and I’m always there when she asks for help. But lately, things have been tense. She tells me she feels starved for appreciation and that I’m illiterate when it comes to compliments or words of affirmation. Honestly, […]
Letting Go of Past Trauma
Dear Penina, Thank you so much for writing your column. I was wondering if you could help me with a persistent problem. An important person in my life used to get angry with me frequently, often yelling, putting me down, and calling me names. Over the years, he worked on his anger and no longer […]
Bridging the Gaps in How Couples Express Love
Dear Penina, I’m struggling with something in my relationship with my spouse. We seem to show and feel love in completely different ways. I’m constantly trying to express my love and care, but no matter what I do, it never seems to be enough or the “right” way. I put in so much effort, but […]
Nishmat Kol Chai: Penina Flug: “Enhancing Your Marriage”
Helping a Sibling When Parents Mishandle the Shidduch Process
Dear Penina, I’m at a loss about how to help my younger sister with shidduchim. I believe my parents are making serious mistakes, but I’m not sure if or how to tell them—they’re easily offended and hold grudges. The problems show up at two stages of the dating process. First, they’re really misguiding my sister […]
Navigating Conflict With Both Sets of In-Laws
Dear Penina, We have been married for 15 years, yet our parents have never truly gotten along. During our engagement, a major dispute over financial promises nearly derailed our wedding. While the money issue was eventually settled, the harsh insults exchanged during that time created a rift that has never been repaired. Both of our […]