Love, Marriage and Mother-in-Law Dynamics: Finding the Right Balance
Dear Penina, I’ve been married for five years and I truly have a great marriage. My husband is a great guy and is very good to me. Since we got married, my husband has been very close with his mom, seeking her advice and trying to make her happy. At first, I was proud of […]
Navigating Family Responsibilities Between Siblings
Dear Penina, I enjoy reading your column and I hope you can help me with my problem. I live close to my aging parents and I feel that most of the responsibilities are falling on me. How do I ask my younger sister who lives about 30 minutes away to help and how do I […]
Addressing Shut-Downs in Your Marriage
Dear Penina, Baruch Hashem, my wife and I are happily married, and we don’t have any major conflicts. We do, however, squabble over some issues—how to discipline our kids, finances, etc.—and my sense is that this is normal for a happily married couple. However, lately, I’ve noticed that whenever I bring up a difficult issue, […]
How To Give A Good Apology
“I’m sorry, okay?!” does not work. Even though it can initially be annoying as hell, a good apology is one of the best gifts to give. When I do couples counselling, I get to see how people give and receive apologies. I get to see the kinds of apologies that don’t work and sadly, do […]
Ask for What You Need
Dear Penina, I’m writing to you today with a question that’s been on my mind recently. As someone who values both tradition and meaningful gestures, I was a little disappointed this Chanukah when my husband didn’t give me a gift. Now, before I go any further, I want to emphasize that he is, without a […]
Connecting to a Daughter-in-Law
Dear Penina, About a year ago, our son got married to a wonderful young woman. The couple is very happy, but I have a difficult time connecting with my daughter-in-law. I have tried many things — sending her gifts, taking her out for coffee or dinner, calling to check in — but nothing seems to […]
Welcome to Dear Penina
Life’s most precious moments unfold through our relationships—as mothers, wives, daughters, sisters, friends and professionals. Juggling these roles isn’t just about wearing different hats, it’s a balancing act of responsibilities and relationships. Drawing from both my professional and personal journey, I’m thrilled to launch this column to help you in navigating life’s most meaningful relationships. […]
Jill Nicolini Interviews Penina Flug Licensed Clinical Social Worker, EFT Couples Therapist, Marriage Educator at Penina Flug, LCSW
Podcast: Headlines — Should Boys and Girls Turn to Friends for Dating Advice? Is it Helpful or Harmful?
5/6/23 – Shiur 433
Stop Asking for Your Needs to be Met
One bit of advice that’s emerged from the last 50 years of the personal development movement is to ask for our needs to be met. As a therapist, it drives me crazy. Of course, it’s not the asking that’s bad. It’s the how of it that mucks it all up. Because in the very moment […]